A granddaughter’s love…

Life, Uncategorized

After months of preparation and organization my grandparents downsized into a townhouse. For anyone who has ever met these two you know their homes have always been extreme and over the top not to mention large in square feet. The reason for writing this isn’t to feel sad or sorry for them in downsizing but rather to bring to light just how it makes me feel as a grandchild. 

I have a strange relationship with my grandparents in that they are almost like a second set of parents. During my pre-teen years we actually lived with them. My granny would make us dinner and make us do our homework. In the evenings we would swim in the pool with her until dark and our fingers and toes looked like prunes. My Pa built us a home on their property and helped put us in a private high school and pay for extra circular activities. My mom was a single parent and juggled 3 job trying to make ends meet. With her working 3 jobs she obviously wasn’t around much and that’s where my grandparents came in. 

My granny would come over in the mornings rollers in her hair and robe on yelling up the stairs for us to get out of bed and ready for school. Summer’s were spent helping her garden in her beautiful hydrangea, and berry bushes she so proudly maintained. Having many dinners with them talking about our day at school and what was going on. These two individuals have always been a huge part of my life. 

I have an unexplainable bond with my granny. She’s one of my best friend! She’s a tough lady let me tell you. She has been through ALOT !!!! She has such strength and yet from the outside looks like a movie star from way back when. 

We have spent many hours together just talking and I learn something new all the time about her. She’s probably a huge reason I have a creative side. She herself was a hairdresser back in the day. She also is an amazing seamstress with some mad sewing skills. Her and I seem to just get each other. We can sit and belly laugh over the stupidest things together. 

My pa and I have a bit of a strange relationship, many people might think we hate each other just from the way we tease and talk to each other. At the end of the day though I think that’s just how we communicate best with each other through our humour. Many nights have been spent recently drinking wine with him, telling me all about the good old days or reminiscing about way back when and wanting to share those stories that he loves to tell. Pas a tough nut to crack he’s like an onion he has lots of different layers. Possibly from the past he’s had and the many different hats he has worn. From being a Air Force pilot, a chicken farmer, a police officer, a senator, and the list goes on. He’s lived a very full life and has done more in his lifetime than most people can ever dream of and he’s still working more than ever. 

However I can’t help but think about the future and what that means for them and for us and our relationship. It makes my heart hurt knowing that the years ahead are going to change. Age changes everyone and I guess I’m selfish in not wanting things to change. I already notice little things changing and it brings me to a dark place thinking of all the what if questions. I know I’m not the only one that feels this way or has gone through this and I guess that’s why I was compelled to write about it. In hopes that maybe this would reach someone that would have comfort in knowing they aren’t alone in their feelings and that I too am struggling.

I feel like I need to mentally prepare myself for the future but I’ve been told there really isn’t a way to prepare yourself for those uncontrollable moments that are eventually going to happen. That is an extremely hard place to be put in, For me I’m such a planner and this “no preparation” thing is so hard to wrap my head around.  I am however so grateful that Harlow has been able to make such amazing memories with both my gran and pa and do look forward to making many more. 

XOXO

Jenna

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